Lost in Translation

Dear Jessica Simpson,

I cant remember the last time you sung anything and it was at least a year ago that you “acted” in anything, so why cant I get away from you? You haven’t DONE anything but you are in every stupid magazine I open. If all you do is go to benefits/premieres/award shows etc am I to presume that editors are STILL running pictures of you because of what you are wearing?

Jessica Simpson: Exhibit A

Let me begin with what concerns me the most about this (other than that it looks like you have dislocated your hip), it is that I have heard that you are best friends with your hairdresser (a la Jennifer Aniston). I would seriously re-consider this friendship. WHY would ANYONE think that YOU could do a bee-hive?? It is none of the following: ironic (do you know what ironic means?), quirky (its you), polished (its you) or classy (ITS YOU!!!). He is certainly NO friend of yours.

You have ruined this look for me. I love a beehive, but are you doning it with crotchet?? Surley SOMEONE must have stopped you before you walked out the door to point out that while going for a 60s feel you evaded the whole decade by hiving your hair (50s) and wearing crochet (70s). Tou are standing RIGHT NEXT TO the man who designed that old-fashioned-tea-cloth of a dress that you are wearing – WHY WOULDN’T HE STOP YOU? Now its just embaressing for both of you.

My regards,
From a very sad person who is embarrassed for you for thinking you would be cool by jumping onto the vintage bandwagon. I hope you fall off and land on that criminal bee-hive of yours.

One response to “Lost in Translation”

  1. Cibbuano says:

    ha! funny!

    I really don’t like Jessica Simpson, and I really don’t think she’s attractive..

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